Moving Right Along

My weight loss seems to moving right along.

I was worried for my Monday weigh-in. With last week being spring break I didn't get to work out as much as I wanted. Plus the ENORMOUS stress of trying to get our house in Durant finally closed so we could meet the deadline with the new one. It has been EXTREMELY stressful. I was worried that I might fall of the wagon with the diet but I actually ended up doing the opposite. I didn't eat as much as I was supposed to. I guess my mind wasn't really on eating food... just getting things done.

Needless to say, I was worried that I had screwed up my 'fat burning' mode. When I weighed in Monday morning I was down another 3.5 lbs!! Crazy. That made 5 lbs for the week and a total of 18 lbs since I started!!

Now, I have a couple of people who have said that I need to put up a before picture (and my bff thinks I should post pics of me trying my skinny jeans on throughout the process...not!). I have struggled with this. Only because I'd really like to just forget that the whole fat thing happened! But, for some reason people are highly entertained by before and after pictures! And really, before and after is so realtive! 'Before' like 20 years ago? Or 'before' like 2 years ago? So, for entertainment pictures I will share with you the 'before'.

This is me before:

Hee hee, just kidding! I'm pretty funny aren't I?

I thought I would start with a picture of me when I was 20 yrs old. I see now that I was pretty skinny. (Back then I didn't think that!)

I love this picture of me! I'm having fun and seem relatively happy. I also do not have issues with weight to bogg me down.

Fast forward to present day.

Seriously, I was trying to think back to when it really hit me that I was too overweight. I say 'too overweight' because I've known for years that I was overweight. But when did something really say, "Okay, this is ridiculous!" There are a few pictures that prompted this thinking. Like this one:

This is me with one of my dearest friends - Amber. When I looked at this picture I thought, "OMG, I have really put on the weight."

Then there is this one:

Just a quick snapshot of me and my hubby. I remember seeing this and HATING this picture of me. Frumpy... flabby.... miserable.

Then there is this one... The Kicker:

I just look miserable. I felt miserable. My cute skinny little legs... gone. My face... too round. My arms... thick. Truthfully, I felt miserable. When I saw this picture I knew I had to do something. It was shortly after this picture was taken that I submitted my entry for the Slim Chance Competition.

And the rest... is being written into history!

Perfectionism

When I was seeing a therapist last year he helped me discover that I am a perfectionist. At first I laughed at him. "Have you seen my house lately? It would prove your theory wrong!" I've always been somewhat of a clutter bug (clean toilets, mind you, but clutter laying around). And then we started discussing what a perfectionist is I realized that he might be on to something.

The definition (found here): a person who demands perfection of himself, herself, or others.

Notice that this doesn't say 'achieves' perfection. It says 'demands' perfection. This is what I do. More so from myself but I find myself demanding it from others too. I think I have an issue with clutter because I give up. If I can't do it 'perfect' then I won't do it at all so I can avoid the frustration it causes!

So, how does this work with my diet? Well, as I mentioned in my previous post, I've made little mistakes here and there on the plan and it is literally maddening for me. When I realize what I've done it drives me crazy! It's all I think about. It's hard to let go of that mistake and move on. I guess the upside is that for the first time in MANY years I'm determined to not give up. I want this so badly that I find myself working twice as hard not to make the same mistake twice.

Having said all this, I weighed in today. Down another 1.5 lbs! I was genuinely surprised! This just helped me realize that even when I make small mistakes I can still have good outcomes!

This message brought to you by the letter 'P' and the number '8'.

Things Are Going...

Pretty good! Monday I had my weigh-in and was down another pound. That put me at about 3.5 lbs lost for the week. Not bad! If I keep this up I will make my goal weight in the time frame prescribed!

This week my kids are off for spring break and I've found it difficult to get to the gym. They are just young enough that I don't really want to leave them home and there are four of them so I don't ever feel like I can take ALL of them with me. A conundrum for sure. I anticipate that my weigh-in tomorrow will not be stellar. But, I'm okay with that.

Things have been a little crazy with the diet too. I haven't 'cheated' or as they say at MRC - 'eaten anything off plan'. But I have noticed that I haven't been perfect with the 'schedule' of food and supplements. For example, I'm supposed to be taking a cap full of these liquid minerals twice a day. Sometimes, at the end of the day, I'll realize that I've forgotten to take the second dose (usually it's the next day that I realize). Or I notice that I haven't eaten in the last 4 hours and missed a protein drink that I'm supposed to take as a snack. This frustrates me. I feel like I am planning my food ALL DAY LONG. I'm constantly writing in my food journal and looking up doable recipes online. I guess this is just an adjustment from the 'don't think about it - just go through the drive-thru' mentality. I hope that eventually this just becomes second nature. Cuz it's driving me bonkers!!!

Today is a Different Day

I feel like I have NO TIME ANYMORE!!! This weight loss competition is REALLY time consuming!!! Not to mention the back up of laundry I'm experiencing!! I feel bad that I haven't been better at chronicling the day to day stuff!

Monday I had another weigh-in. I think that I deliberately avoided blogging about it because it wasn't 'great' news. I was only down 1/2 a pound. Realistically, I realize that this is still good news. Half a pound is better than no pounds. But I had just lost 4 lbs at my last weigh-in so it didn't make sense to me. I think I was depressed about it. And the fact that the people at MRC told me that I couldn't work out 4-5 days a week like I had been. I am REALLY enjoying the gym and I was a little sad about this news!

Today? Today is a different day. I weighed in again today and was down 2.5 lbs! Back on track. Plus, they took my measurements again and I've lost 24 inches total! 24 INCHES! 2 of those in my boobs (thank goodness)!! Amazing. I celebrated by going to the gym. (:

Twitter

There are several of you who have expressed an interest in working out with me or following along with the meal plan. So, I have been trying to come up with a way to let people know when I'm working out, etc... The answer came to me in a vision ~ not really. But I did think of Twitter. I've heard of it and I know one or two people that use it so I thought it might be the answer. Basically, it updates in real time what you are doing. So, I can put on Twitter that I'm going to the gym at a certain time and hopefully those who want to go with me will see this and meet me there. Clever, huh? I'll see how it works. My Twitter updates are to the right directly under my weight loss ticker! Let me know what you think. Or if you have any other bright ideas. Or if you think it's stupid. I'm strong, I can take it!

Incredible!

With MRC they require that you come in and weigh twice a week. When I heard this I told myself that I would weigh in on Monday and Thursday mornings but that I would only count (for myself) the Monday weigh-in because there really wouldn't be a huge difference in the weigh-ins. WRONG! In the rain and sleet this morning I dragged my kids to MRC and weighed in. DOWN 4 MORE POUNDS!!! That's a total of 9lbs so far!! How exciting is that?! I'm sure I will hit a snag sooner or later but... holy crap! After this glorious meeting I hit the gym to 'keep up the good work'!

One More Thing...

This is what I affectionately call BLOP {Butt-Load Of Pills}.

I take these before every meal.

What a Weekend!

I have A LOT of things swimming around in my head that I want to share with you all but I need to do it so that it makes sense... so bear with me!

I guess I need to back track a bit...

Our trip to Fayetteville was a success! I didn't feel tempted at all by the delicious Chick-Fillet that everybody else was eating and I was not starving at all with my salad and protein drink! This is great news for me! So, I CAN eat out with other people and make good choices on food!! I will say that I'm not sure how ANYONE can eat 8 oz of salad vegetables. This coming from a salad lover. I really do love salad. But, 8 oz!!! It's as big as my head! I'm only able to eat about 5 oz which is mostly cucumbers, green peppers, and cauliflower for heavier weight (with some romaine lettuce and spinach)! I'm working on it though!

Dinner on Saturday was spent at my dad's house to celebrate my brother's birthday. I had to make my own dinner because they were having spaghetti. I was fine with that. It really wasn't that bad. I did have a tinge of desire for some of the Better Than 'Six Flags' Cake that everyone else was scarfing down but I just went into the other room and the desire left!! I guess I'm learning that I don't really 'crave' food I just eat bad stuff out of habit. But now that I have a commitment there is no craving. It's great.

Sunday night and last night I made food for my whole family and strangely enough they all LOVED it!! Who knew that two of my kids would love raw cauliflower? I've never bought it for them before so I had no idea! Turkey patties one night, grilled fish the next.... I'm scoring big in the "Best Mom in the World" competition now too!

This is what I eat for breakfast each morning (at least for the first 4 days):


Measly, isn't it? Truth is, that purple protein drink has 15g of protein in it and fills you right up! So, I really never feel hungry!!

I've been trying to go to the gym everyday... that way if I miss a day it's not that big of a deal. Sat and Sun aren't added into that equation. So I'm trying for 4-5 days a week. We'll see if I can make it happen!

Yesterday was my weigh in (drum roll, please)... 5 lbs lost! In one week! Can you even believe it?! I realize that a lot of that might be water retention but hey... I'll take it!!

Tomorrow starts the next menu where I will be allowed some other food options. Thank goodness. This is hard but not impossible. Especially, when you are in the zone!

The MRC people suggested pulling out an old piece of clothing that we can't fit into anymore and using it as a visual motivater. Uh. Here's the deal. I don't have any. Like Angela, I gave it all away. And even if I did have something it would probably be totally out of style! Well, as I was poking around in our storage unit for something I came across a tub with my name on it. Well, I'll be! Some old clothes that I just couldn't let go of!! I found a pair of jeans that I was wearing the night that I met my husband. Before you look at the picture let me just warn you that it was a "Disco" themed dance so the jeans are a teeny bit bell-bottomy (if that's such a word). But they are going to be my motivator!!! For now anyway, until I can find something totally cute and girly that I would look fabulous in!!


Wish me luck!!

Food Scales on Fridays

...don't try to buy them. Really. All those people who just received their food instruction on Friday from MRC just bought out all the food scales. Unfortunately, I was too exhausted to go looking at other Walmarts. But, luckily, a light from heaven shown down on the Walgreens sign across the street and that's where I snatched mine.

The food instruction was a lot to process. I'm not sure I felt fully prepared to start tomorrow but I'm going to do it! Our family is going to Fayetteville to see the Magic Tree House Musical (which we're very excited about) but I'm concerned about eating on the road on my first day of the diet. Wish me luck!!

I really have a lot of thoughts going thru my head that I just can't seem to formulate here right now. It doesn't help that it's already 11:30 PM and I just want some sleep. I'll do some major formulating tomorrow!

So Far, So Good.

The last couple of days have been great. I have more energy and overall, I feel happier.

I'm assuming that the momentum and excitement will taper off at some point. But, I'm enjoying it right now. Speaking of motivation...

After years of wanting to get healthier and not having the motivation to do so, I have this fantastic, extrememly generous opportunity given to me. This is my motivation. I have accountability now. Time will tell, but I really think this is what it's going to take to get me to where I want to be.

So, I'm curious... what's your motivation? What is it that is going to get you moving in the right direction? What can I do to help that along?

Tomorrow we get our food menus. Maybe I won't be so chipper tomorrow? (:

Who Needs Appetite Suppressants?

When you have to drink copious amounts of water to take down 8 horse pills!!!! Oh heavens.

Met with the trainer today... I'm so excited!! I love the facility and the trainer was great. Such a positive energy as I left that place with my two little punks! I'm actually going to do something to make a difference!!!

Couldn't Get Enough

So, as I said, I totally enjoyed my first visit to the gym but I couldn't do a full workout because I double booked myself and had another committment. Now, my old self would have told herself to not worry about it and just try again tomorrow. But my new self said "Get your butt back to the gym... today!" So that's what I did. After I picked up the two older punks from school we headed to the gym. My husband met me there and took the two little punks and the older ones came with me. They sat and did their homework and when they were done they got to play on all the cool 'kid' equipment while I finished my workout. I think they loved it!

For the first time in a long time I actually enjoyed working out! Maybe it was all the Hannah Montana and HSM music that I listened to. I'm just sayin'. Give me a break! I have a 9 yr old and an 8 yr old. That's pretty much the only music I own! I will say this, I had to hold myself back from belting out "Life's what you make it"! I almost forgot that there were other people there that might not appreciate such an outburst.

What a day.

Slim Chance

Well, some of you might have a hard time believing that I've won something again. I don't blame you after my little April Fool's Joke last year! I can hardly believe it myself! But I did! I'm sure that my luck will change someday!

So, here's the low down:

When we first moved here to New City I found a really great website for moms in the area and it had tons of information on things to do and places to go. I get an email update from it probably once a week. A couple of weeks ago I skimmed over the email and it described a weight loss competition that it wanted to start with one of the moms from the website and were asking for women to submit entries to be in this little competition. There would be two moms chosen to receive 3 months free membership to a local gym and 3 months free with Metabolic Research Center (weight loss program similar to LA Weight Loss or Weight Watchers). This is huge in and of itself! A local radio personality got in on the action too ~ even though he's a guy. So... I had this page open on my computer for about a week and a half. I didn't even turn off my computer! This is something that could change my life if I was ready for it! But I was hesitant. I even drafted a couple of emails with my entry but deleted it. I was worried about how public it would make my life. My issues. But, on the other hand, I knew that I needed to do something. On the last day before the deadline I wrote out my little 'essay' and submitted it. You guessed it! They picked me!!! There were two women chosen out of about 30 entries and I was one of them!!! So what does this mean, you are asking? It's kind of like Biggest Loser but on a much smaller scale. We are all four battling to be the one person with the most weight loss at the end of the 3 months as well as a 'grand prize' (that hasn't really been described yet). The lady from the website and the radio personality do not qualify for the prize at the end so it's just between me and the other mom chosen. During the 3 months we are going to working out together, supporting each other, and blogging about it on their site (right up my alley)! I'm sooo happy for this opportunity! I need this. I need my health back. I need my self-esteem back. This is just the motivation that I needed!

Woohoo!!! Wish me luck!

Turkey Dinner

That's what I had yesterday. A very yummy smoked turkey with green bean casserole and sweet potatoes followed up by some dang yummy carrot cake. What? I know it's not Thanksgiving. I'm not losing my marbles. This was my 'last meal' of sorts. And man was it yummy!!! Alex Hart had a few beers... I had a turkey dinner. On Saturday I had a Braum's chocolate malt with extra malt (malt is kind of like beer). It will probably be a while until I can enjoy one of these again!

Getting to meet everyone involved in this little competition was really fun... gotta know who I'm up against! Today we met at the Metabolic Research Center for our introduction to the food aspect of the weight loss. I have to say, this was a ton of information to absorb! Not to mention, the insane amount of pills I'm going to have to ingest. Up until about 10 years ago I couldn't swallow pills. It was all mental but I had a hard time! I even have a hard time with birth control pills!

After the joy of being weighed and measured was over, Martha and I checked out the Fort Smith Athletic Club. I must say I was really excited about this!! I can't wait to get to work in that place! My best friend is a Zumba instructor in New Jersey and I've been to a couple of classes before. They are so much fun! Bring on the Zumba!!

So, I should have introduced myself at the beginning of this post but it didn't really flow with the title. Here ya go:

I'm 35. I've been married for almost 12 years to a fantastic husband. We have 4 awesome kiddos (sometimes). We just moved to Ft Smith about 6 months ago from Durant, OK. I'm almost 50lbs over weight. Insane. I've always just told myself that it was from having a butt-load of kids. But truth is, I haven't cared enough about myself to take care of myself. Now I do.

I'm looking forward to getting to know you all and working hand in hand with Catherine, Martha, Angela and Alex to make a dream come true! And to win, of course!!